You're not bugging me at all! + I know my limits, I'll disengage if anything is triggering for me :)

Mm. I'm interested in you lack of interest. Do you feel like you have no interest in eating? That could point to something more akin to depression or a depressive episode. The thing is that lack of interest caused by said apathy can fuel disordered thoughts towards food. Like "oh, I haven't been wanting to eat lately. I'll take advantage of that and not eat at all." Often, people with EDs who get sick and/or lose their appetite/interest are triggered into a relapse by said lack of appetite. They see it as something to exploit. They don't feel an urge to eat food, they aren't interested in eating it; so, instead of forcing something down or having something small and high-calorie because they know they biologically need to eat to stay healthy, they take it as a benefit. They take it as that they don't need to fight against their need/interest in eating in order to restrict food intake, because they don't have it! Do you think that could be happening to you? That you feel generally apathetic towards food — which is bad, but you know that you need to eat something regardless — but that you're exploiting that lack of interest to eat less and less?

Did this make sense? hahdhs i kind of explained it poorly... It could be a general apathy towards things, in which case please check your mood regularly and see if you're experiencing noticeable anhedonia. But that can spiral into an ED, that's what I'm trying to say. Especially with those thoughts and behavior patterns of yours!