THEY MAKE ME WANT TO HURT MYSELF AND OTHERS. I don’t think I’ve had any ground-breaking thoughts about them recently, or anything…

Remember that concerto line I was speaking of a while back? It applies best to Tsumugi, but I feel like, in spite of Rei’s hedonism which is often overlooked by fans, it fits him during the war as well. Ugh, they really are a trinity to me. Let me push Tsumugi out of the way.

Isn’t it crazy how, through my love, I am who manifested their interaction in the on-going event? Not the first time I’ve done that. I didn’t even remember it was his birthday today, also, I did the thing where I start thinking about someone really hard before their birthday again… I don’t know why this phenomenon happens. Happy birthday Rei and Izumi. Anyway, there was something so intimate about how they spoke to each other… I might be imagining things, but it feels like a conversation between a couple that has been together for a long time.

M: “You’re so cruel, Rei-san.” R: “You need to be less secretive, Mikejima-kun.”

It seems he knows and understands his successor more than Madara would like for him to. He’s always been perceptive, so I don’t think Madara can really hide things from him no matter how hard he may try. And then, Kaoru and Madara’s reaction, with Kaoru saying “…How about you ask your own heart that?” — it just clicked to me that they were calling out his hypocrisy, for he was once the same. Even now, he isn’t transparent.

Aside from that… I just love the Madara who would do anything for Rei. But I wonder if “anything” would extend to giving him his heart. You know I’m not much of a fan-fiction reader due to how picky I am, but I’ve had ‘s Gravy’s works on rotation lately. They just get it. Ugh, “considered violent, and reckless” captivated me, too. You know how I am about piercings, but that aside, I think it’s really clever.

I’m also thinking about… a younger Madara who hooks his finger into the belt loop of ore Rei’s pants so he won’t get away from him as they weave through a crowd. Rei notices and teases him, saying that if he wanted him closer, he could have just said so. And Madara tries to retort with something like an “I wouldn’t say thaaat,” but the words tangle in his throat when Rei’s claws take hold of his hand. It’s different when the one initiating isn’t him. He feels off-balance. I like doing this to him.

But also, I want Madara to bully Rei more, too… especially during their third year. I like when he’s a piece of shit, and it’s good if he throws someone like Rei off kilter. Because I think they’re both characters that few can manage to do that to, it really makes things interesting. I have a thing for pairings that bring out uncommon or unexpected (at a glance) sides of those involved.

I imagine a lot of care and trepidation and unspoken words between them, rather than mdtm’s pushing and pulling and poking at open wounds. And a bit of playfulness, too. And some adult fun, as they said in that little summer postcard this year. Whatever that means.

I realized I haven’t read a Rei story in so long! I probably should. I would probably have more to say. I don’t know why they’ve been giving me such strong feelings recently. Can two eldest daughters fall in love? It’s uncertain. Can they fall into something worse? I hope so.

(But I also just want them to be lovey dovey… with his crash after his second year, wouldn’t Madara’s care be so convenient…? I wonder if Rei would like it at all, to be doted on by someone without asking for it. That’s probably strange and new to him.)

(Also… them being younger seme older uke is peam. I’ve been thinking about that.)